My Newest

From the last pair of shoes which I have posted, I bought 3 more pairs of shoes and returned 1 pair cos there were defects and they do not have the colour which I wanted anymore. During the weekend I bought myself a new pair of shoes from Zara. I love it.




I love shoes

Back of My Head

Recently I found something, perhaps a habit or a memory which I have probably put it away for a very long time, it is actually something positive but I just forgot bout it, completely.

Recently I met a friend and showed him around Singapore, he told me I come across as an unhappy person, pessimist and skeptic. I refuse to admit at 1st but then I realise, yes I have changed into those 3 things which I just said and I hate it, maybe that's why I hate being here thinking that this place actually changed me into someone who I do not want to be.

The truth is just that I changed and I blame it on the place which I am living. I was too unhappy that I became something which I do not even like it, which adds on to my unhappiness.

It made me wonder, what happened to the old me which was very much myself? Maybe I just threw him to the back of my head and locked him up.

At that point I realise that I have found the source of my unhappiness, which is rejecting the place that I am in for what it is and thinking that I do not belong here. Just to sum it all up, previously I just hate this place and hate myself for being in this place. Which is probably why I am so unhappy.

Let's face it, I will not get everything I want but I have to live with it. It all brings me back to when I first went over to Germany, where I hated everything and rejected everything. I even refused to speak German to anyone. Life was miserable at that point, probably the lowest but I manage to tell myself, "Live with it, something great might happen"

I realise that what made me go on each day, being happier or accepting and started to immerse into the culture was waking up everyday telling myself, "Today is gonna be a great/good/wonderful day"

It actually works and from Sunday onwards, I've been telling myself every single time I wake up, embracing the new day by saying "Today is gonna be a great/good/wonderful day"

I am a much happier person now, I missed me (What a weird thing to say)

A Brief

Just some updates:-

I was in Laos and Vietnam. Did not make it to Thailand due to the protest, how fucked up can it be? I was really looking forward to Thailand, not to mention the shags and shopping.

Laos was great, Luang Prabang, a UNESCO heritage site was superb, gay and expensive (not surprised cos whatever that rhymes with gays, should be expensive, don't you think so?)

Vang Vieng was insanely full of party goers, straight of course, how boring.

Vientiane was not too bad, befriended with a courtesan (I only use that word when I respect a person of that profession) she was nice, told me a lot of stories and her very sad past and experiences. Can't exactly understand her English but it was nonetheless nice to get to know her. She could straight away tell that I was gay, she should be some faghag or whatever

Vietnam, hmmm just 1 word would sum up what I feel bout it:- Suckballs. Need explanation?

After the backpacking trip, I went back to Penang twice actually, for my grandma's 80th birthday and for my holidays of 10 days.

I'm back in Stressapore, I mean Singapore. I am cool with Singapore and respect it but the people, don't let me get to that.

Well I miss the beach, I need a quiet getaway. Phuket sounds tempting, no? Well it's kinda crowded there. Mauritius have to wait for some time, lack of vitamin M

Makes Me Laugh

Every time when I am in need of a laugh, this video would make me laugh

So Close

This song was introduced to me by my housemate, he knows that it relates to me really well.

Guess what?

He's correct, it relates REALLY well to me

Roadtrip by Darin Zanyar, runner up for Swedish Idol