1 Drink Too Much

I watched the finals yesterday. It was depressing but it was a great environment. Everyone from different countries and stuff. I drank and drank and drank, not remembering that I did not eat anything during or before that. So I got kinda drunk and I was in the train, then I realised that I had motion sickness and I ran out the next station and vomited. Was kinda lucky that Marc was with me cos or not I would have threw up on the floor. But at least it gives me some short term happiness and forgot that I was all lonely inside.....

I have been thinking bout James the whole day, I think I might be addicted.

Marc and Hao had another quarrel again and I am starting to get depressed that I would always help people with their relationship and when they are back together and stuff they look so happy and everything while I am here lonely and waiting for love to come. But it's just life isn't it? The good person never wins.... Marc told me yesterday that I deserve someone who is good and stuff. He hopes I find love soon. I hope I would find love soon too. I do not know why but sometimes the loneliness in the soul kills.

I have never wanted anything more, I tried to give everything. But I think as my dad has always told me, giving is better than receiving. I would love to receive some love that I've given........

James

This is weird but I just met a guy yesterday night and he reminds me so much of my ex and a guy who I use to have a huge huge crush on.

He looks like Carl, a guy who I had a huge crush on but he shifted to Hong Kong but in certain ways as in some characteristics are similar to my ex.

I do not know, I have been thinking of him the whole day. How could I be in love in just 1 evening? I must be insane.

James treated me so gently and pampered me. I am not sure if he feels the same. I have butterflies in my stomach every time I think bout him. Although he did not shower me with gifts but it was some other things that are way more important to me. It felt sort of like he embraced me, I don't know....

I am afraid that he would not fall in love with me but just will offer me a friendship.

My mind is filled with him. He is such an amazing person, I am crazy

Jack, Carl's best friend told me that Carl was waiting for me to ask Carl the question while Carl was making the decision to go to Hong Kong. I did not asked and I kissed Carl for the last time 2 weeks before he left for Hong Kong.....

Singpore Youth Festival

I was at the Singapore Youth Festival with 2 usual friends of mine and it was ok. Nothing exciting but people screaming and stuff it was ok.

After that we walked and got lost and we realised that we need to cross the river to get to the city and we wanna walk. So I think we walked for like maybe 2 hours or something until we got to Bugis.

It was ok and after dinner we wanted some stuff from McDo (again!!!) and we stood there for our turn and this really drunk or insane guy went to Marc and said something and his ice cream cone fell and his hand grabbed it and stuff, it's nasty!!!! Try grabbing the whole cone from the tip of the ice-cream, nasty!

So we decided to go in to get the stuff instead of the counter outside and there were children in there!!! ALL children, OMG. Then we were making fun of them cos I do not know why and suddenly I realise that they are from Hong Kong, cos I heard them speaking and those poor children were having really hard time trying to order stuff and the travel coordinator did not bother to help them.

Those children had a really long conversation with the cashier cos they are only able to speak Cantonese while there is only a cashier who is able to speak Cantonese and I am being unhelpful by not helping them. Well...... it depends on my mood and it got bad when I saw so many children flooding the counter and stuff.

I really wanna watch sex and the city......

Was geht an mich

I did not go to school today

I am an island-mensch

I watched football yesterday and was happy that Germany won against Turkey

Marc and Hao is ok again

I could be the Mc Do ambassador cos I have been eating it religiously EVERYDAY for whole of 2 weeks. Now I feel like puking...... I'm a McDo die hard fan

Ich will mich verlieben

No, I am not a Mexican but I lurve Mexican food.

It is getting too warm for me over here and air conditioning is not preferred by moi

I need to finish my assignments and projects soon

I need normal sleeping patterns, after UEFA cup, I promise to sleep properly

I need a date

Bonne nuit........

Good and Bad

I talk too much. I really hope they will be ok together and he will talk to him soon. Life's so complicated. Maybe I should not talk so much

Besame Mucho

I do not know but I think I am a very selfish person. People tell me stuff bout me that I do not see in me. Maybe cos I always think badly bout myself and the thing I am proud bout myself which is also I am ashame of is being mixed race. Other than that I cannot find a reason to be proud of myself.

I dunno.....

I have been listening to 2 songs. Besame mucho by Andrea Bocelli and Bleeding love by Jesse McCartney. I sing to them and it seems like Yelena thinks I can sing, well cos she was the only person whom I have sung to, except my ex which I sung Leaving on a jetplane to him on our anniversary. I really love singing, but maybe only to fill the loneliness in my heart.

When I listen to besame mucho, I close my eyes and sometimes tears flow out cos I am picturing something so beautiful yet very sad. If only someone would hold me while this song is playing. Besame mucho means Kiss me much in Spanish.

I am a very hopeless romantic and I would not be ashame to admit that. I'd do almost anything for the person I love.....

I have to go to the Immigration and Checkpoints Authority tomorrow cos the address in my pass is wrong even after changing it. Good night.

Besame mucho, como si fuera esta noche, la ultima vez, que tengo miedo a pederte (Kiss me much, like tonight was the last, because I'm afraid I might lose you)

EM/UEFA Song

I love this song so damn much well mainly cos it is from one of my favourite singer. It is one of the songs for the UEFA cup or in German we call it Europameisterschaft or in short EM. It is Fieber by Christina Stuermer. ue is U with the 2 dots on top but I am using the English keyboard so yeah. Listen to it and enjoy! If you need any translations, ask moi!

This is the song

Wir haben fieber, kommt fieber mit!!!!!

Camping Trip

I went camping as written in my previous post. It was great and I have a sunburn now. I have tan lines and it makes me feel great but the pain from the sun burn is not fun. So yeah the camping. Well we cycled there and now my legs are hurting and stuff. We (Marc, Hao and I) were camping at Pasir Ris Park, if you do not know where it is, it is at the east side of Singapore, near the airport.

I do not know why but this time we did not terrorize anyone but we just made fun of everyone. Yesterday as we were barbecuing, there were a German guy and his wife. We needed charcoal cos the wind was so strong and it would not light up so I went over to ask someone from the whole group. I knew he was a German cos I know it, it's like a sense of mine. Anyways, after that Marc asked the lady which part of Germany is the guy from and she replied Germany. We were like we are not retarded. So we asked again and she said oh I dunno and she asked why. Marc pointed at me! And said oh he is learning German..... I'm like hello!!!!???? I am not learning German and you know that biatch.... I speak it just like you and with an accent now..... And she was like oh and went back and told them bout it.....

So yeah I am really tired and the night it was raining so bad that our tent was moving and shaking around and the wind blew the top off! I had to go out and put a poncho on top of it and got myself all went and the tent was flooded. It is NOT fun but hey it's camping.

During the whole duration I found out what Hao is like when he is living with others. One word: Selfish. He is VERY lucky that Marc is totally blind. Even Marc agree that Hao is a very difficult lover but he is so freaking in love with him and stuff that Marc just take the pain when Hao does not care bout him. Oh well life is NEVER fair as I always emphasize it.

Oh Marc and I were talking bout Xavier Naidoo. He called him some word which I forgot in German but it is also the same meaning as Mischling. It is NOT nice cos he called me that too. Ish! And he keep on saying that I am Mexican. Well no Buritos for you Mister! Anyways I do not know what I am talking bout and Portuguese were not in Mexico, it was the damn Spanish!!!!!! Sorry, Portugal and Spain are always enemies, even now so yeah. Forca Portugal!!

Ok nite nite

Wir Haben Fieber!!!

Portugal was playing against Germany the other and I was in a REAL dilemma cos I do not know whether I should choose Portugal or Germany cos they are both related to me. Portugal is blood and Germany is growing up. So yeah...... But Germany won 3-2. And I think Christiano Ronaldo is not hot. I don't know why are people so crazy bout him. I think the goalkeeper for Portugal is so damn hot he gives me sleepless nights. He is think kind of Portuguese that I would be proud of heh. I would call him a hengst. Ok I am awake now..... Forca Portugal!!!

Willkommen

Yesterday was kinda fun but it was also a little bit hectic. Me, and 2 other friends which are a couple we went to shop for a tent and some camping stuff cos obviously we wanted to go camping, Ja.

And one of them, Marc said hmmm I have never had so much fun shopping before and his lover, Hao said yeah that's cos u have E..... around and blah blah. Marc kept on thanking me for bringing Hao back to him and changing Hao and make Hao talk and be more open and stuff. Yeah well if they are happy then I guess I am happy.

Anyways, we bought some stuff including alcohol(Of course!) and we decided we wanted to try out the tent. So we went to some field beside the MRT station to build our tent and stuff. After building it we felt so comfy we just stayed there. Well the only local among the 3 of us is Hao so he was like telling us that it is illegal to camp and stuff. But we did not care. Marc and I told me well we will cover up by saying we are foreigners and stuff. So in the morning, at like 5 am people start to run around and old people we in their groups doing some tai-chi and stuff. We got irritated and to avoid being caught by the police we took a bus to Changi Village Beach or something where it is legal to camp. Ok now I know why it is legal there...... Cos planes fly pass like every 5 mins non-stop! It is so loud I think in total I slept for like 2 hours the most. Well so far this week I did not land up in my bed at all. It's either McDo or camping.

The agony that I am always facing, 2 love birds embracing each other in front of me always and during the camp.... too much info. Anyways well I just wanted to be with my close friends and if they are loving and happy then I guess I have to be fine too. We will start our real camping tomorrow until Sunday. I feel kinda tired thinking bout that. And tonight I will not get no sleep cos I need to stay up to watch the match between Germany and Portugal. OMG I can't believe it! I do not know who to support. Germany which I stayed for some time and had feelings for or Portugal, my blood and real mother land of my ancestors. Well WTF I dun care but I secretly hope that Portugal will win but I am fine as long as no one dies. Don't you think Philip Lahm is kinda cute? Well cute as in little boy cute......

Anyways I got myself a new bicycle and my butt hurts from it.........

The title was Willkommen cos it was the song that was playing in my head since yesterday. It is by Rosenstolz.

Cu

Something To Laugh

My friend sent me this clip and it has 2 episodes. It's called Que hora es? (What time is it? in Spanish) It is really funny. It is better if you'd understand Spanish cos it's in Spanish. All you need is basic Spanish.

Episode 1

Episode 2

Nights in McDonalds

I have been spending like 3 or 4 nights in McDo cos my friends and I watch the UEFA cup over there. I was never into football but I suddenly find football quite an ok thing. Loads of people say that it's not gay to do that. Well lemme tell you something, you do not always have to fit into the stereotype y'know. And loadsa people when I was back in Germany watch football!

So 3 or 4 nights in McDo means 3 or 4 nights or not sleeping and having a horrible sleep pattern. SO night is becoming day for me while day is becoming night for me. It is actually really bad and I have been eating so much McDo that I am kinda worried now. It's like when I am there I would drink like 1 or 2 soft drink, 1 hot tea, 1 hot Milo, 1 hot coffee, nuggets, apple pie, breakfast and ice-cream of course. I know it is crazy......

Ever since I have been staying alone, I eat fast food really frequently. I saw this fast food parody bout fat ass it and stuff and it makes me worry sometimes and not to mention I am getting a little bit out of shape lately. Well at least I am starting to exercise after like a few months of doing nothing. My preference will still be Burger King and KFC tho. Maybe Long John's Silver sometimes.

The weird thing bout being in McDo for so long is that people tend to notice and normally I hang out with this Singaporean boy and his boyfriend which is a German. The boy goes home early or half way cos he has a curfew and I generally click with the German guy for some obvious reasons and people are starting to think that we are together cos we talk so much and stuff while he is having some relationship problems cos his bf, Singaporean is so quite and is quite reluctant to maintain the relationship. Anyways I'll still be their friends. And I think I have been speaking too much German too but it's fun cos no one understands and they like to stare so much.

The 1st night in McDo, was the funniest cos we practically terrorize the whole place and flirt with anyone who passes by the door cos we were so bored and we made up some new recipe with whatever that we bought, ugh it's disgusting to think of it but it was funny. The smell which we create were so unbearable from the ketchup, coffeemate, parts of burgers, fries and etc. I swear I would puke if I were to take the dare of eating it.

Yeah so it was really fun and I was talking to my German classmate which is in Malaga, Spain now on the phone while in McDo and he was having very much fun, I dunno why....... But I do miss my classmates back there. They say they might visit me next year but let's see. Toodles

Short Notices

Some stuff which I put to remind myself or short notes bout myself:

I am representing school for Supply Chain Asia Forum but the school did not inform me. The director for the event did.... weird

I need to pay school fees by 25 June

I need to clear room

Meet up with Marc for jogging and coffee

Meet Sacha for coffee

Send Robert to the airport

Do the laundry

Projects and assignments: Design in Culture, Basics of Entrepreneurship, Purchasing Principles and Practices, Logistics and Supply Chain Management.

I wanna eat sushi

I need to exercise

I need to have normal sleep

Iron clothes

So from now on if I have short notices I'll just post it as a title and with like short notes. Well it's my blog, so I'll do whatever I want....

Festival Fantasia

Well it's Singapore Arts Festival 2008 and I went for Festival Fantasia just now.

Oh, did I told you that I have not slept since 2 days ago? Cos I was in Mc Donalds talking to a German friend with his oh so complicated boyfriend for 15 hours! We drank so much coffee, ate so much and stuff.

Ok anyways I was all sleepy and tired but I went for this Festival Fantasia. It's actually an orchestra playing and stuff and there were several solo ones with the orchestra. If you do not get me, it's fine cos I'm too tired after not sleeping for so long. So it was like for 3 hours and was really nice. I actually like the violin players, flutes and cello.

It's really amazing what music can mean and I think I am going to like this kind of music. Is this called classical music? Well I dun care, but I think it is very defined and great! But the guy who apparently won a million awards for playing the piano made several mistakes and he was not good at all! Only the last song cos it's his best song and his personal song I think. That guy's name is Wenyu Shen, apparently really talented and stuff, I think it's just some marketing gimmick. And Tee Khoon Tang were another solo performer or featured performer in this concert thingy and everyone thought she had a period or she just wanted to rape the violin. She was ok I think but for professionals she suck. Whatever folks...

I think this kind of concert makes me very sane and not to mention sleepy :P Nitey nite

Discrimination IN My OWN Country!

I have been longing to write this VERY long ago and finally I found some time to write this. I am seriously against the government, well it's not like I am a terrorist or something but I just disagree with the policies and everything else

Why do we have a political party which is so split? It's like at the end of the day we get most of our ministers from UMNO cos of the racial 'balance'. What is with MCA or MIC? Why can't they merge and call BARISAN NASIONAL?

What does it mean when we have so many sub-parties in there? Trying to lurk racism? Just put aside differences and abolish this stupid UMNO MCA and MIC, it does not make life easier having these 3 parties but it would make life better if it were to only be Barisan Nasional. Can't they just choose capable people?

We are all born in Malaysia for God's sake, which means we are Malaysians! Now we have crappy ministers and the shit goes on.

Not to mention we fell in our corruption ranking? Hello? We are getting more and more corrupted, so much for being proud of my country. Stop corruption! Our soldiers are the best paid in South-East Asia, that's right! And ministers? WTF the wrong with you all? HA? You guys get like a high pay every month and you guys want more money? Try to hide it up by blaming others? So where are the morale in our society? You guys are trying to teach us to be good people in Moral Studies, hey set an example. Don't think the rest are ignorant towards it ok. Educated people would know what is happening and it does not take a genius to know it!

The government waste so much money on nothing! Hello how much have u guys spent on public transport? Hah? Increase the petrol price, but IMPROVE the freaking public transport, seriously! Waiting for a bus to come for like 2 hours is not fun!

Hey ministers, try taking the public transport for 1 day and u guys will pee in your pants. We spent like billions on public transport and shit, yeah ok say 1 billion and I guess a few million will go into someone's pocket, that's for sure! Corruption!

Malaysia Truly Asia? Hello? Yeah showing that Asia is very corrupted and racist? So truly Asia! It should now be Malaysia Truly Racist and Corrupted! ARGH.

I am so proud of my own country but I am not afraid to point out the flaws. So trying to be like Singapore covering up all the flaws? Well yeah Singapore is so fokken small so they can but Malaysia, you can't! Why cover up the flaws? It is not gonna make u any better, just face the truth that the government SUCKS!

People are suffering and want a better government ok! We want peace and harmony not some racist country which discriminates their own people! We want effective and efficient public transport! We want a pay rise due to inflation! We want security, not a country full of crime! We hate illegal immigrants that come here to kill and steal and do crime!!!!!!!! We want immigration to be fair. We want a balanced society and no racial lines! Ok? Got it?

Ministers acting are like children seriously and refuse to take responsibility! Even a child might be smarter than them. Why be so corrupted? Isn't this selfish? Police are corrupted as well and are with the ministers in stealing the citizen's money. Hey asswipes we pay you guys ok and yet we have no freaking rights and live by racial lines? At the end of the day it is our money! We should have a say!

This is one screwed up country, seriously either buck up or resign.

Verdammte scheissssssse!!!!! ARGH!